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  #1  
Old 11-30-2020, 06:59 AM
LettersFromFlyoverCountry's Avatar
LettersFromFlyoverCountry LettersFromFlyoverCountry is offline
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: St. Paul, MN.
Posts: 4,821
Default Marriage and the RV Builder

For a long time, I've wanted to write an article about homebuilding and marriage.

There are at least three types of marriages surrounding homebuilding.

* The fully engaged spouse who really is into the project.

* The spouse who is supportive of the project but doesn't want to participate. He/she has their own thing going and makes clear the project isn't hers/his, it's yours.

* The divorced spouse. It probably didn't collapse because someone decided to build an airplane, but it probably didn't help.

There are plenty of examples of the first scattered around VAF and I've enjoyed talking to them over the years and will probably circle back if I go ahead with this research.

I need only walk into the next room to meet the second kind. And they're pretty easy to find.

So I'm not too worried about providing their perspective and tips for keeping a marriage intact during an airplane build.

The third is the hardest to find, at least in terms of getting everyone to talk to a writer and be open about a failed marriage and an airplane project. And I'm not really interested in grinding marital axes. I want to find people who lost a marriage, who would've liked to have it have succeeded, and are introspective about things.

So I don't really know if this will get anywhere but it's worth putting out there. If you are in the THIRD group, and you'd be willing to talk about the strain a project put on a marriage, what you would/wouldn't do differently etc., please send me a PM or contact me at bcollinsrv7a@centurylink.net.

I think an article of this magnitude and research would be very helpful for married people considering building an airplane.
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Bob Collins
St. Paul, MN.
Blog: Letters From Flyover Country
RV-12iS Powerplant kit
N612EF Builder log (EAA Builder log)
Last article: "Gonna Finish This Sucker" (Kitplanes)

Last edited by LettersFromFlyoverCountry : 11-30-2020 at 07:04 AM.
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  #2  
Old 11-30-2020, 07:25 AM
fixnflyguy fixnflyguy is offline
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Winston-Salem, N.C.
Posts: 1,354
Default I was lucky !

While our marriage is "second time around" for both of us, I must say I was lucky to find my wife, especially since she had never been in a small plane before, didn't know anyone "built" their own, and could not fathom the reason to live next to an airport. I was clear in our earliest date nights, certain things I would be doing were going to be "non-negotiable", such as hangar time, airport bumming and such. By the third date, she got a ride in my 46 T-craft, spent some time helping with final details on the RV-4 I was building, and helped me recover an Aeronca Chief over run and flipover at the local airport. Surprisingly, every event I threw out, she became more excited about aviation, and I knew this was a keeper! The hardest part was the 40 hrs. of Phase one where she could only watch from the ground..40.1 on the Hobbs and she was in the back seat and hooked for ever. After several years of dating, the plans were stirring for the big day, but all the typical venues seemed dull..so I said "lets get married in the RV-4"..YES she said..flying right? Of couse, so we did at 5280 ft above the home airport in formation of 5. Since then, OSH, fly-ins, airshows, and flying anywhere are a no brainer. I got really lucky!..Oh, and she loves living at the airport and watching everyone else when we arent flying..Life is great!
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RV-4/N76WE
8A7 / Advance NC
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  #3  
Old 11-30-2020, 07:51 AM
edclee edclee is offline
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Lancaster, SC
Posts: 152
Default Marriage

Bill, congratulations! My wife of 56 years is a flight instructor as am I and she, naturally is supportive and happy with our flying. While I purchased the RV9A we have now, I did build the Sonex we flew for 4 years including three camping adventures at OSH. I too am greatly blessed with a wonderful wife. I am luckier than I deserve.

We need to fly to Advance and visit one day. I was born in Burlington, 1943
Ed

Quote:
Originally Posted by fixnflyguy View Post
While our marriage is "second time around" for both of us, I must say I was lucky to find my wife, especially since she had never been in a small plane before, didn't know anyone "built" their own, and could not fathom the reason to live next to an airport. I was clear in our earliest date nights, certain things I would be doing were going to be "non-negotiable", such as hangar time, airport bumming and such. By the third date, she got a ride in my 46 T-craft, spent some time helping with final details on the RV-4 I was building, and helped me recover an Aeronca Chief over run and flipover at the local airport. Surprisingly, every event I threw out, she became more excited about aviation, and I knew this was a keeper! The hardest part was the 40 hrs. of Phase one where she could only watch from the ground..40.1 on the Hobbs and she was in the back seat and hooked for ever. After several years of dating, the plans were stirring for the big day, but all the typical venues seemed dull..so I said "lets get married in the RV-4"..YES she said..flying right? Of couse, so we did at 5280 ft above the home airport in formation of 5. Since then, OSH, fly-ins, airshows, and flying anywhere are a no brainer. I got really lucky!..Oh, and she loves living at the airport and watching everyone else when we arent flying..Life is great!
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Sonex/Corvair 2016 Finished, Sold 2020
RV-9A 2005 Purchased
IO-320 160 hp
Exempt but happily paid for 2021
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  #4  
Old 11-30-2020, 08:02 AM
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bkervaski bkervaski is offline
 
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Birmingham, Alabama
Posts: 1,757
Default

I found a unicorn! She loves building and flying and definitely easy on the eyes

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We got married at 10,000 feet, in the airplane we built

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  #5  
Old 11-30-2020, 08:50 AM
74-07 74-07 is offline
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Greenville, SC
Posts: 551
Default Wives

My wife, the mother of three boys, all with their pilot's license, has it all figured out. When anyone asks her how it's possible that every male in our immediate family is a pilot, she responds, "It's a genetic defect."
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RV-7 sold
RV-8 flying
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  #6  
Old 11-30-2020, 09:01 AM
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Plummit Plummit is offline
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: SoCal
Posts: 1,258
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by 74-07 View Post
My wife, the mother of three boys, all with their pilot's license, has it all figured out. When anyone asks her how it's possible that every male in our immediate family is a pilot, she responds, "It's a genetic defect."
Now that's funny!

-Marc
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N814RV
2021 Donation Made
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  #7  
Old 11-30-2020, 10:16 AM
wilddog wilddog is offline
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: va.
Posts: 617
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by bkervaski View Post
I found a unicorn! She loves building and flying and definitely easy on the eyes

Attachment 5237

We got married at 10,000 feet, in the airplane we built

Attachment 5238
What is the plane she is working on in the upper picture with tube fuse and alum wing?
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  #8  
Old 11-30-2020, 11:23 AM
charger81 charger81 is offline
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 248
Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by wilddog View Post
What is the plane she is working on in the upper picture with tube fuse and alum wing?
RV-15?
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  #9  
Old 11-30-2020, 11:49 AM
scsmith scsmith is offline
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ashland, OR
Posts: 2,801
Default

My wife falls in the #2 camp. We keep balance by doing lots of home projects intermixed with airplane projects.

There was a P-51 parked at San Jose airport for ages, just sitting with flat tires, shredded canopy cover, peeling paint. The story that went around the airport was that it once belonged to a couple and was the husband's pride and joy. When the couple divorced, the wife got the airplane. She let it sit there and rot at the airport as a parable to other pilots I guess.
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Steve Smith
Aeronautical Engineer
RV-8 N825RV
IO-360 A1A
WW 200RV
"The Magic Carpet" Flying since Sept. 2009
Hobbs 635
LS6-15/18W sailplane SOLD
bought my old LS6-A back!!
VAF donation Dec 2020
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  #10  
Old 11-30-2020, 11:55 AM
RV10Man RV10Man is offline
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Oklahoma City, OK
Posts: 1,097
Default

My wife is supportive in EVERY way possible, but she's not a flyer. She'll drop any and everything she's doing if I need a hand or help with something. She never asks how much something cost either.

She's totally supported our daughter all the way through her ATP rating, and encourages everyone she can to fly..........she's just not a flyer herself.
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