John your story not funny but sad and true. However a funny web site:
http://tankonempty.com/
So how long can you drive on 'E'. Looking at the site, +40 miles looks like a typical average, with a min of 20 and max of 80 miles. Some occasionally report 100 miles! Apparently cars made for the American market have more reserve when the E light comes on. In Europe, E means E. It was on 20/20 last week. I'm not recommending it, but I have pulled a "kramer" once or twice in a car. I only really worried about fuel state one time in an airplane. Once was enough.
PS if you think you want to try it, some electric fuel pumps burn out if starved for gas.